Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Why I believe in “Yes” for Prop 8

First I want to preface this by saying that I don’t mean to offend anyone. No political vote has been won unanimously and so if I am voting contrary to what you feel I hope you do not find personal offense to it. My beliefs are my beliefs. They pertain to my religion, which means that not all my sources will be considered credible to everyone reading this. But my stands on this has not been dictated to me by my church- it is simply what I have decided to believe on and I know that although I was taught by others in my church, I have done my own studying and know for myself that I am not being manipulated by anyone in my beliefs. That doesn’t mean that you have to believe as I do, but I am going to write them as I believe in it, and hopefully people will be able to understand my view, even if they do not agree with it, and hopefully know why it is so important to me. If people want to comment you may. Write things like, I agree, or ask questions if you don’t understand something… Do NOT leave questions if you are trying to start a debate- that is not my purpose in writing it. If you disagree you may state so and if you wish to write something contradictory I suggest leaving a link, do not write it in your comment. My actual beliefs are not up for debate, they are, in a sense, fact, since you cannot tell me that it is not how I feel, but if you wish to show a different view leave a link to something that shows your opinion and your standpoint. I’m not looking for loopholes in my logic- my beliefs won’t change, but if you wish for me to clarify something ask. If you leave a link I will read it, but if it suggests a debate I probably won’t comment on it. If you fail to comply with my wishes on MY note, your comments may be deleted. So be warned to write your opinion elsewhere.

I’m also going to say that I have some quotes from the Bible. I use the King James Version- it was the first one to be translated into English and although some may find it hard to understand, hence the other simplified versions I believe it to be the most correct since it was an original translation, not a translation of a translation (some of you may be aware of what happens in the game of telephone), so I will do my best to explain what the scriptures mean to me. This once again relates to what I believe. If you believe differently that’s fine, but I am stating it as fact because it IS what I believe to be true.

First I want to start with a broad overview of something that may seem impertinent, but I promise to connect it all before I’m through. What makes a nation great? Throughout all of history there have been many great nations. How many have lasted? What has been the cause of their falls? Historians will tell you that it was due to weakness in leadership, geographical weaknesses that made it easy for invasion, economic difficulties, or any number of other things. I believe that there is a different thread that ties, at least most falls of civilizations together. (This is my theory, but it is also my belief- that there is a different reason for at least most falls of civilizations.) I believe that the two greatest sins are murdering and those revolving around chastity, fornication, adultery and yes, even homosexuality. These two things have to do with the giving and taking away of a life. I think most Christians will tell you it is wrong to kill. A lot of Christians also believe it isn’t ethical to clone because you are taking God’s power to create into your own hands. I believe that the way that children are brought into the world is very important and though I will readily admit that no family is perfect, I do believe that every child should have the right to be raised by a mother and a father. There are certain divine qualities, or natural gifts, instincts, roles that are given to both men and women and I believe it takes one of each in a family. Yes I know sometimes there are single parents, due to divorce, death, any number of reasons. I also know many gays and lesbians who are very caring individuals, who would probably do well with children, but there are certain things, no matter how qualified a person is that the child would miss out on. You don’t have to agree with me on this point. I do know that if God had created two males or two females alone we would not be here. He created Adam and Eve, a man and a woman, and that is what I believe to be the divine institution of marriage. No matter who raised you, whether it was a mother and father, a single mom or dad, or even two caring individuals of the same sex, no one would be here if, somewhere along the line there was not a man and a woman. Since this union is how I believe children ought to be brought into the world, (sometimes they are and sometimes they aren’t- this world isn’t perfect) this issue of marriage and how it is defined is also important to me.

Now, to continue on, I believe that you cannot sin in ignorance- “Because the law worketh wrath: for where no law is, there is no transgression” (Romans 4:15. Other similar scriptures include: Romans 5:13, James 4:17, and 1 John 3:4 which talk about how you need to know to sin, or you sin when you know and don’t follow through). This does not however pertain to the laws of the land, but the laws of God. His laws are not voted on, they are what He says, so don’t mix this up with laws in our land where if they were abolished they wouldn’t be wrong anymore. (If murder was allowed in this country it would still be morally wrong.) But I also believe that you cannot be saved in ignorance. Well, I believe that God doesn’t change- even if society does. So, to me, marriage was originally between a man and a woman and in God’s eyes it will always be defined. Also, God always sent prophets. I believe these prophets were supposed to warn the world- as much as they could, so that they could be saved. But once a people were no longer ignorant they can now sin. This is what happened in the Biblical account of Sodom and Gommorrah.

“And there came two angels to Sodom at even; and Lot sat in the gate of Sodom: and Lot seeing them rose up to meet them; … And he said, Behold now, my lords, turn in, I pray you, into your servant’s house, and tarry all night… and they turned in unto him, and entered his house.” (Genesis 19:1-3) So far, some holy men or angels have come to Sodom and Lot invited them to stay at his house, and they did. “But before they lay down, the men of the city, even the men of Sodom, compassed the house round… And they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where are the men which came in to thee this night? Bring them out unto us, that we may know them.” (Gen. 19:4-5) So, the men in the city came and surrounded Lot’s house and asked for the angels to come out, and it says, so that they may know them. This may sound harmless to you in our English, but since it is the King’s James version, it was written in the English of the time. In this case, both the Hebrew word it was translated from and the original English use the word ‘know’ in place of a sexual word. To know someone “Biblically” is to have sex with them. And these are men asking to have sex with other men. And Lot said, “I pray you, brethren, do not so wickedly. Behold now, I have two daughters which have not known man; let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you, and do ye to them as is good in your eyes: only unto these men do nothing; …” (Gen. 19:7-8) So Lot tried offering up his daughters, although it would still be a sin, a lesser one to try and persuade them to not commit such an act. I believe Lot thought he had raised his daughters well and that they might be able to persuade them not to commit a sin and also had been taught well enough that they would not allow any sexual sin to be committed with themselves either. Then in the next few verses the people tried to break into Lot’s house. They basically think that Lot has made himself a judge over them and plan to deal with Lot, his daughters and the two men who are staying with Lot. The two angels are able to stop the men but tell Lot and his family to leave. (In the previous chapter the Lord had said that he wouldn’t destroy a city if there were righteous people within it, and so Lot and his righteous family members are now leaving.) Then the city is destroyed, because of the sins of the city which has been manifested in this story. (The complete story continues through verse 29.)

Now you may say, well that is a Biblical account- it’s only pertaining to one belief- one people, one time. Well, here is where other times come into account. We don’t know much about the Xia dynasty in China but we have the writings of the next dynasty. In “The Mandate of Heaven” recorded in the Book of Documents, Yi Yin, an advisor to the first king of the Shang dynasty is giving advice to the new king. He relates things about the previous dynasty and keys of success that had been lacking in the Xia dynasty. “… the former kings of Xia cultivated earnestly their virtue, and then there were no calamities from Heaven…. But their descendant did not follow their example, and great Heaven sent down calamities, employing the agency of our ruler…. The attack on Xia may be traced to the orgies in Ming Tiao.” The original kings of the Xia were virtuous according to this and therefore there was no struggle with power, but then their descendant, the last king of the Xia dynasty had orgies. It is not fact that that was the cause of the fall, but that’s what Yi Yin thought. Then he continues with counsel for the next king starting with discussing three “fashions” which will shortly be explained.

“If you dare to have constant dancing in your palaces, and drunken singing in your chambers,- that is called the fashion of sorcerers; if you dare to set your hearts on wealth and women, and abandon yourselves to wandering about or to the chase,- that is called the fashion of extravagance; if you dare to despise sage words, to resist the loyal and upright, to put far from you the aged and virtuous, and to seek the company of…youths,- that is called the fashion of disorder. Now if a high noble or officer be addicted to one of these three fashions with their ten evil ways, his family will surely come to ruin; if the prince of a country be so addicted, his state will surely come to ruin…. The ways of Heaven are not invariable.”(Andrea p. 25-26)

Yes it might have been biased, but there are facts written in there such as how it said the previous king was known to have orgies and then lists the opinion that the author of this document isn’t sure if that was the cause of the fall. This document also proves that my theory is at least not brand new. That the laws of God or Heaven do not change and that when sexual sins enter into the reigning authority and is there accepted that is when a nation falls.

Then there is Troy. The fall of Troy. Why did Troy fall? Well, you could blame it on the fact that they didn’t have Achilles. You could say that their army wasn’t superior, or even that they fell for the clever ploy of the Trojan horse. But the truth is, why were the armies there in the first place? Paris stole away the wife of Menelaus, Helen. We know it was considered wrong in the eyes of the people there because of Paris’ brother’s reaction when he finds out. We also know that it was soon justified away. Well, this sin is alright because she’s happy, or whatever. Not the best thing to do. Don’t rationalize away your sins. So, in my opinion, why did Troy fall? Because they were not ignorant about adultery being wrong and yet they did it and accepted it legally as ok.

Now, this one I find interesting, although it is not a hundred percent tied to the actual Fall of the Roman Empire, but it does contribute to my theory. Towards the end of the Roman Empire there was the development of the Roman mime within Roman theater. “The Romans enjoyed sexually provocative dramatic material, and the emperor Heliogabalus, in the first part of the third century C.E., is said to have forced mimes to perform actual sexual acts.”(Wilson, p. 81) This was at the beginning of the third century and in 330 it was already clear that the Roman Empire was beginning to fall. You may think- big deal- that happens in Hollywood all the time. But if you remember, actors used to be all male. If sexual acts were being performed on stage, that means that it was homosexuality being publicly accepted and enforced. This was in a nation that had accepted Christianity as their religion, and had scriptures which condemned the practice.

This leads me to Romans 1. This chapter was written as an epistle from the apostle Paul to the Romans and pertains to homosexuality. According to the Bible, the laws have not changed. It is still a sin, just as it was when Sodom and Gomorrah was destroyed. I have learned in my history classes that things are not addressed, laws are not made, letters are not written unless there is an issue with it. For example we wouldn’t make a law that said that we can kill aliens from outer space without being punished, unless there were aliens that proved to be or were thought to be dangerous. Well, in Romans chapter one, Paul is writing an epistle, or letter to the people residing in Rome. “For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who hold the truth in unrighteousness; Because that which may be known of God is manifest in them; for God hath shewed [or showed] it unto them.” (Romans 1:18-19) So the wrath of God comes to those who are unrighteous who have the truth or knowledge of what they’re doing is wrong. Then it goes on,

“Wherefore God also gave them [the people who are sinning and have the truth] up to uncleanness through the lusts of their own hearts, to dishonor their own bodies between themselves: Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshipped and served the creature more than the Creator, who is blessed for ever. Amen. For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet. And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient; Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness….” (Romans 1:24-29)

So to go back and rephrase this, God let these people choose to dishonor their bodies, for He will not take away our agency, even when His laws do not change. It says that they twisted and changed the truth of God into a lie to justify their ways. When it says they worshipped the creature more than the Creator this refers to humans being the creature, as we are a creation of God, and they followed after corrupt ways that man came up with instead of honoring God’s laws and wishes and therefore no longer worshipping God but the creature. It refers to the sins as vile affections, saying that even the women were involved in doing things that are against nature. And when you think about it in nature, males mate with females, not males with other males, or females with other females. It says that men left the natural use of woman- that of reproducing, and instead of mating with females, as nature would suggest they turned to each other. Thus we have men working with men that which is “unseemly” or unnatural or in plain terms- homosexuality is unnatural.

Before I go on I feel I should address something else, kind of a side note to the main topic of this essay. I am declaring in this essay quite bluntly that I believe homosexuality to be a sin and the reason for falls of nations. But I am NOT saying we should be intolerant of these people. Many people would argue that God loves everyone and He does not discriminate. I’ve been told that God is no “respecter of persons”. I agree with them. I KNOW that He loves everyone, regardless of race, upbringing, genealogical ties, or sins. But He does not love the sin. Although some people may have a hard time (we are all humans) with drawing the line between the sin and the sinner, God is perfect. True Christians can stand up for what they believe in, what is sin and what is not, without hating the sinner. I know I am not perfect, but I do not seek to change God’s laws in ways where I fall short, I simply try to do my best, knowing that as I do He will make up the difference. In the Bible there is a story where Jesus is teaching in the temple,

“And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst, They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act. Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou? This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him, But Jesus stopped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not. So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her. And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground. And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst. When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? Hath no man condemned thee? She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.” (John 8:3-11)

In this story you have a woman who was found to have sinner and was caught in the act. Yet we see that no one is perfect in this story. Jesus at the end says he does not condemn her. He says, “Go and sin no more.” In writing this article I don’t mean to throw any stones at any particular individual, for I am not without sin. But I am trying to stand up for the issue. God doesn’t say, I don’t condemn thee, let’s change the law and make it so that it’s not a sin anymore. He simply does not judge the sinner and still maintains that the sin is a sin. In voting yes for Prop 8 I am saying that I believe it is a sin to marry someone of the same sex. The civil rights have already been granted unto gays and lesbians so that the individual is not discriminated against. Some may feel that voting yes is a discrimination- that is where we would differ. I believe marriage to be ordained of God, and therefore I believe that, that definition should only be implied as God sees fit. If individuals choose to sin, as I see it, that is their choice, but I personally am not going to stand by and watch the sin become legalized.

Now as for the Book of Mormon, which I also believe in, there are scriptures in it prophesying about the promised land- this land- America. How we need to follow God and our country will be strong, until it no longer accepts the principles. In the Book of Mormon it shows us that the Lord gives commandments with promises and when we don’t keep our part the Lord has consequences. This is shown when He says, that inasmuch as they keep the commandments they shall prosper in the land. It talks about this land of America saying,

“Wherefore, this land is consecrated unto him whom he shall bring. And if it so be that they shall serve him according to the commandments which he hath given, it shall be a land of liberty unto them; wherefore, they shall never be brought down into captivity; if so, it shall be because of iniquity; for if iniquity shall abound cursed shall be the land for their sakes, but unto the righteous it shall be blessed forever.”(2 Nephi 1:7)

The Book of Mormon talks about people who lived in America anciently. And it shows people who went astray and were then destroyed. In the book of Ether, the prophet Moroni, the last prophet of the Book of Mormon writes,

“And he [God] had sworn in his wrath unto the brother of Jared, that whoso should possess this land of promise, from that time henceforth and forever, should serve him, the true and only God, or they should be swept off when the fullness of his wrath should come upon them. And now, we can behold the decrees of God concerning this land, that it is a land of promise; and whatsoever nation shall possess it shall serve God, or they shall be swept off when the fullness of his wrath shall some upon them. And the fullness of his wrath cometh upon them when they are ripened in iniquity. For behold, this is a land which is choice above all other lands; wherefore he that doth possess it shall serve God or shall be swept off; for it is the everlasting decree of God. And it is not until the fullness of iniquity among the children of the land, that they are swept off. And this cometh unto you, O ye Gentiles, that ye may know the decrees of God- that ye may repent, and not continue in your iniquities until the fullness come, that ye may not bring down the fullness of the wrath of God upon you as the inhabitants of the land have hitherto done. Behold, this is a choice land, and whatsoever nation shall possess it shall be free from bondage, and from captivity, and from all other nations under heaven, if they will but serve the God of the land, who is Jesus Christ, who hath been manifested by the things which we have written.” (Ether 2:8-12)

Now, in my personal opinion to throw God’s opinion of marriage out the window simply because society “demands” it is to throw God out of our lives as well. Just as in Romans 1:25 says, “Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshipped and served the creature more than the Creator, who is blessed for ever. Amen.” In a way implying, we don’t need you anymore- we like society’s view better. I also believe that a nation becomes ripened in iniquity, or that the fullness of iniquity comes when certain things are legalized and legally considered acceptable in a country. And so I will stand for this union of marriage as I think it should be defined.

I am in no way a prophet. But in the Bible it says that you can know a true prophet from a false one by their fruits- meaning by their results. Prophets often give us prophecies, if these are true, then they can be considered a true prophet. I have my own interpretation of certain prophecies and if they are wrong it doesn’t mean that the prophets were false, only that I didn’t understand the prophecies accurately. But I believe that if Prop 8 does not pass it will be the beginning of the end of our country as we know it. I don’t know how long that fall would take and if it does pass, we may never know. But this is the way I see it, and if you thought, from your own personal studies that your nation that you love would fall apart wouldn’t you, no matter who you thought you were offending, stand up for what you believe? Even if you do not agree with me, or think my logic isn’t sane, I hope you can at least see, at the very least, that my concern stems from not only what I feel is right, but what is actually best for all of us. When nations fall there is chaos for everyone and there are usually deaths- I would not wish that on anyone. Yes, this may seem a little extreme, but I believe in God. I believe that this is important to Him, and I believe that if this country wants His help we need to stick to His values and not our own. "Every man lives his life for what he believes. Every woman lives her life for what she believes. Some people believe in little or nothing, but they give their life to that little or nothing. One life is all we have and we live it as we believe in living it and then it is gone. But to surrender who you are to live without belief, is worse than dying... yes, even worse than dying young."(see Bibliography 5)

Bibliography

(In order of use in the above essay)

1. The Holy Bible: King James Version. Translated under King James’ command. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, Salt Lake City; 1979.

2. Andrea, Alfred J. and James Overfield. The Human Record: Sources of Global History. Sixth Edition/Volume 1: To 1700. Houghton Mifflin Company, Boston; 2009.

3. Wilson, Edwin and Alvin Goldfarb. Living Theatre: A History. Fourth Edition. McGraw Hill, Boston; 2004.

4. The Book of Mormon. Translated by Joseph Smith. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, Salt Lake City; 1981.

5. My mom quoted it from memory and said it was either from Joan de Arc the play or a quote from Joan de Arc when she was about to be burned at the stake. May not be an EXACT quote, but the meaning is still there.

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Stealth

So, this is another BOMPs story (see an earlier post in October for more information). It was a Sunday evening- pretty lowkey and I decided I'd go to bed early- a rare occasion at the time. So, I got ready for bed- pjs, washed my face- the works. As I'm getting into bed I get a phone call. "Stealth mission. CODE RED!!! Downstairs NOW! In Katy's apartment!" Click. End of phone call. Of course I couldn't pass up a stealth mission, and since it was code red, I didn't exactly have much time. I threw on a sweatshirt and basically ran down the stairs. On my way down I happened to notice Kali flirting with a guy outside. Neither one of them lived by that stairwell, but there they were leaning up against a car, talking. I decided to be casual. I knew them both- was friends with them both, so I waved hi and they waved back. I continued on my way down the stairs acting as if I was just going to stop in and say hello to a close friend. So I go down the stairs and then turn back underneath to get to the door. I knock on Katy's door. SLAM!!! I hear someone slam into Katy's apt door. I hear a "Who's there?!" whispered harshly through the door. So I stated my name. Then the door opens, but the top lock, you know one of those chains that goes across the door was still attached. So through the small crack they verify my identity. Then they close the door, unlatch the chain and reopen the door to admit me in. They close the door and I realize that everything is black. ALL the lights are off. I hear someone whisper, "GET DOWN!" So I drop to all fours. As my eyes adjust to the lack of light I realize that there are people everywhere, under tables, behind chairs, couches, the likes- all staring out the front window. I find Logan- the one who had called me and pretty much the leader of our group. I crawl over to him to see what's the problem. He explains that Kali has been flirting with, we'll call him Andrew, and that she has him under her spell. She must have hypnotized him or given him some potion. We need to save Andrew from her spell somehow. The problem is, they are right outside, and she knows that they were in there watching her before the lights went out, and she never saw anyone leave. If we turn the lights on or go out the front door she will see. The back door, which leads out into the inner courtyard is straight in front of the window, which she can also see. So we are stuck. Luckily Katy is on the ground floor. I suggested climbing out a window into the inner courtyard. We can walk through the courtyard to a different exit and casually stroll back around to the side of the building where Kali is as if we came from a different apartment. She would most likely know we snuck out, but at least she wouldn't know how long ago. Well, then we realize that she can't see the front door from where she's standing and we decide to just quietly file out the front door and into the courtyard from that entrance. I guess it was much simpler, but I still like my window idea....

So, because of the angle and it being around the corner we were able to make it safely to the inner courtyard. We exited as planned and rounded the corner. We decide to head up to Logan's apartment and pretend like we're just going to various apartments. We realize that Andrew has already said goodbye to Kali and has left. But Kali can't just be let go. We have to spy on her and make sure the rest of the world is safe, of course. So we are in Logan's apartment and some people decide it's time for them to go home for the night. But Katy, Logan and I remain. We have to come up with a new plan. This is when she gets in her car and moves it to the back of the apartment parking lot. So we're trying to figure out a plan and Logan decides we need ammo.

He runs to the kitchen and then when he comes back we decided to head out, but we realize that she is driving away. So, we wonder if she's moving her car to the other side of the building. So we decide to take a stroll around the building to see if it's on the other side. We get most of the way around the building and no luck. But Logan knows some other places he thinks we can check. So he says, I don't have any gas in my car (and since it's Sunday we can't fill up) and then asks, do you have gas in your car. Unfortunately I didn't. So he asks Katy- Katy doesn't have gas either. At this point he pulls out his ammo. We find that it is really just peanut butter and a spoon. He looks at us and shrugs, "What? I was hungry." Then he says, let's hot wire a car! Katy and I laugh and go along with it knowing he's kidding, but then Logan walks over to a car that we both know isn't his. He opens the door and jumps in. He yells for us to come over. Katy and I look at eachother skeptically. He reaches down and shortly thereafter the car starts. I'm thinking, what the heck. And he now calls more excitedly, "Get in!" So, he's already hot wired this car, and somehow I just figured that I wanted to go and decided to jump in too. As I got in the car I realize there are keys in the ignition, much to my relief. Apparently, it was another guy's car from the ward, and he had given Logan permission to drive it whenever and had told him where the spare keys were kept, inside the car. So we went for a drive, unfortunately we never found Kali, and this was the end of our adventures central to her, although I saw her many times afterward and we had some fun times at other times. But most of them aren't story worthy. :)

Friday, October 17, 2008

Dream jobs and Dream homes

So, most people think I am insane, but I have "dream" jobs and homes. Not real dream jobs and homes, but jobs and places I want to one day say I once had. For example, I want to live in a trailer park. I want to live in an apartment in a big city in a skyscraper- or on some top level so that I have an awesome view. I want to live in a townhome one day. There's also another place I want to live, but I can't seem to remember it at the moment. There was a trailer on my mission that, crazy as it might sound, I wanted to live there- but then sisters left that area. There was an area that the missionaries lived in the back of a funeral home- that would have been fun to add to my list, but isn't common enough to make it onto my dream list of homes. :)

Then there's dream jobs. I love to drive and I love the smell of pizza- so I want to be a pizza delivery person. I also love sorting things, and I like mail- so I want to work in the post office- not out front where you see most of the workers, but in the back sorting the mail. I also want to work at Little Ceasar's and learn how to make their garlic cheese bread- I became addicted to it on my mission. Then I want to be a waitress. I don't know exactly why, but I just have always wanted to. As of yet I haven't had very many jobs. I grew up working in my dad's law office when I wanted to. From a young age he would give me random tasks- such as updating his books- which I used to love. Then later he taught me how to file. Then he had me do random secretarial tasks because for a few years he didn't have a secretary so there were lots of projects to be done. Then I really liked learning how to write the first drafts of trusts and wills and documents. Then one summer coming home from college he told me I couldn't work at his office- because he had rented out the space I used to use to another guy. But his old law firm was willing to hire me. Easy life, I know. I never had to apply for a job until last year- where I got a job but it was a long process and I finally got it in time for when I was going home for summer. But I loved my dad's old law firm. They had me as a back-up receptionist as my official title. But I was basically a secretary there too. Good times! :)

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Irrational Fear of Bees

As some of you may know, I have an irrational fear of bees. To get to this level of fear you would have to assume that I was deathly allergic or had been stung many times. But truthfully, neither one is true for me. I hate pain though and even if you tell me it's not bad, I still run. Yes run. I don't stand still.

When I was young, someone once told me that bees won't sting you if you stay still. Well, one time in first grade (yes I remember the grade) I went out to recess. Before I got to the opposite side of the playground where my friends were playing for recess a bee landed on me. So I stopped running and I stood still. I posed myself so I could see the bee on my shoulder from my peripheral vision. I stood there the WHOLE recess. Granted it was the shorter recess, which I don't remember how long it really is. But at the end of our recesses we would have aides who would blow a whistle- the freeze whistle. When you heard the first whistle you had to freeze. If you didn't you could end up with a detention. Then you waited until they blew the second whistle which meant time to go to class. Well for the freeze whistle I had no problem, I was already frozen. But then the second whistle blew and I still stood watching the bee. I must have smelled really good that day or something. Everyone vanished from the playground and I was still standing. Afraid of being late I decided to take off running. I shooed the bee from my shoulder and bolted towards my classroom. I turned back at one time and saw the bee hovering in the air and it at least appeared to be following me. Luckily I was a good sprinter at the time. As I got to my class I turned back and still saw the bee. Well, I had learned that bees have multiple eyes and can't see very well. So, I ran to my desk and hid underneath it for the first few minutes of class. I don't know if my teacher, Mrs. Welton noticed, but she never asked.

Ever since that day I have not stood still for a bee. I usually run. Have I been stung? Once. I stepped on a stinger once. I know, very traumatizing, huh? And so therefore I have entitled this my irrational fear of bees, because such it is. I will now tell some stories of how bad I can be.

There are three accounts on my mission of times when I encountered bees. The first one was with Sister Goertzen. We were out walking- sometime in the middle of summer. There are times when she gets excited and forgets to eat. My stomach, on the other hand, rarely forgets a meal. So, lunchtime came and I was getting hungry and irritable. Sister Goertzen wasn't trying to be mean, she just simply hadn't thought about it because she herself wasn't hungry. Well, she then announced we should go tracting- in a direction farther from our house. I was out of water as well and started to throw a fit. She started to realize that I was hungry and needed some water (I don't know if we ended up going home, but I know I got water and something to last me- the story ends before my stomach was resolved. I'm just giving this background as a means to understand the emotional state I was in.) It was also the wrong time of the month. Yes, that makes it worse. Well, something landed on me and I shooed it away without even thinking but while shooing it away I happened to glance at it and notice what it was. I was too dehydrated, or delirious to process it though. I ended up freezing. I went into a state of shock and Sister Goertzen after a moment decided to ask if I was alright. It was at this point that I broke down crying as I realized that a bee had landed on me. I laugh about it now- so feel free to join in with me and many others. I can be very pathetic at times. :)

Another time happened with Sister Chipman in Baton Rouge. I was the driver. Well, I got in the car and shut the door and realized I had just trapped a bee inside that was sitting on the door. I knew I had to get away. But I couldn't get to the door handle to open the door again without crossing an imaginary line of safety. So instead, instinctively, I tried jumping to safety. Just as a child would run or jump into the arms of their mother for safety- so I was trying to jump into Sister Chipman's lap for safety. But, we were in the car, and I didn't exactly jump high... but instead I tried jumping- through the center console to safety. I ended up with a large bruise. Well, Sister Chipman, to save me, had to reach over me, curled in a ball into her side, open the door and shoo the bee out before I was able to recover.

The last story from my mission happened with Sister Jensen. We were helping this lady, Odette Pea put up Christmas decorations. No one would let us do service, and she was the only one who gave us any sort of task. So we took it gladly. Well, she had some deer to put up on top of her roof and so we climbed onto her roof. Mind you, it was a pretty flat roof. Well, we're up on top placing the deer into posts that were attached from previous years. I think I got up to go get the scissors because I was standing at the time the bee enters the scene. I start running away from the bee- on the roof. My companion is staring at me in disbelief, wondering what in the world I'm doing. Well, I managed to make a fair amount of noise because shortly thereafter Odette Pea comes out to see what's happening. She gets out, looks up and asks if all is alright. My companion tells her I was running from a bee. Now, Odette Pea put her hands on her hips and in a very southern Motherly scolding tone says, "Sister Lang, what is worse? Falling off a roof or getting stung by a bee?" Truth be told- this may sound sad- but I'd rather fall off a roof. It was just one story- and I've never had broken bones before- it seemed a much better alternative to something I already know how much it hurts... Plus, if I fell off a roof, I might get lucky and not break any bones.... But even if I would rather get stung by a bee, what was I going to say? If I said falling off a roof was worse, it would make common sense that I wouldn't run from a bee- and yet, that's what I had done. So I replied, "Being stung by a bee?" And I put on my sweetest, most innocent smile. I'm not sure, but I think she laughed and called me foolish next....

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Remember to keep the Sabbath Day Holy

So, since I often don't think before I act, and am naturally a klutz, I seem to have many embarrassing moments. But I'm going to share just one today. Most of my embarrassing moments aren't worth remembering because they happen on a regular basis, but this is one of those that hasn't been repeated. It all started with a family trip to Hawaii.

My family loves Hawaii but this one particular year, our Hawaii trip just barely overlapped with Girls' Camp (a camp over the summer put on by my church). I was going to be a Youth Camp Leader and it was my sister Carly's first year. I couldn't miss it! So, arrangements were made for my grandparents to fly home with Carly and I, two days early so we could make it on time to Girls Camp. We left Saturday night and flew over night- I don't think any of us slept on the plane though. When we got home, everyone was tired. My grandparents are not accustomed to all-nighters, so they were going to sleep and miss church that day. Carly, as well, was also tired and chose to go to sleep. But I decided I could take a shower to wake me up and still make it to church on time and then I would just sleep the rest of the afternoon. So I went to church. Now, some of you may not know, but my family is a big part of the ward. And my extended family that is normally there were also on similar vacations and weren't getting back til that afternoon. So needless to say, I felt like I was attending a different ward because it was close to empty and many of my friends were related to me. But I felt proud of myself for making it to church. (I don't however remember if I stayed awake for all 3 hours...)

Well, on my way home from church I realized that I was low on gas. There's a commandment, "Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy...." And it talks about not having to work or making anyone work, so generally I do not go to gas stations, because even though I'm filling up my car by myself, I'm spending money, and the gas stations are open, whether because of me or not. So, by my own definition I would be breaking the Sabbath. But I decided it was an emergency. If I didn't fill up today I wouldn't have enough gas to get to the church the following morning for Girls Camp, and it's not like I was in town the day before. Well, as fate would have it, I ended up going to get gas.

I put in my card- credit card denied. So I tried again. Credit card denied. So, I think, no matter, I'll use my other card. I turn around to go get my other card. I realize that the door had shut, so I go to open it, seeing my wallet lying on the passenger's seat. I find, to my dismay that my door is locked. I to this day have no idea how it became locked. At the time I never locked the doors while driving and when I got out of the car I would only lock it using the clicker attached to the keys. But there my door was- locked and I could see my keys lying on the floor on the driver's side. I figured, I should call someone. But my cell phone was also lying in the passenger's seat. At the time I only had a few numbers memorized. I had the phone numbers of my family members, all who weren't home. I had my home number memorized, but for any who knew Carly at the time, they know that she was a VERY sound sleeper. I had my best friend, Anna's phone number memorized, but she went to Poland over the summer. I had no idea who to call. Then I realized that my neighbor, Norma hadn't gone to Hawaii. So I went into the gas station to ask to use a phone book and a phone. I did not at the time have Norma's phone number memorized.

I asked the attendant if I could use the phone book and a phone. He looked at me and said, "That will be $20." At the time I hated confronting people. If I wanted ketchup at a restaurant I couldn't ask for it, someone else had to do it for me, so it was hard enough to ask to use the phone in the first place. But when he said $20 I lost it and started crying. I didn't have any money. I had a credit card that had been denied. I couldn't get to my other card. I didn't have any cash on me- any I would have had was in my car. So, how was I going to be able to pay $20? I felt like all hope was gone. Well, this guy apparently doesn't handle tears very well. He all of a sudden became distraught trying to help. And so he asked, "Is it local?" Meaning the phone call which I understood, but all I could manage in response was, "It's just around the corner." And I pointed the direction. I should've known that he was just trying to figure out if his kind act was going to cost him a long, long distance phone call to China or somewhere....

So I finally was able to call my neighbor, asking her to break into my house (I don't know if she had a spare key or had to crawl through the doggy door) and get my spare keys and bring some spare cash. While waiting however, the missionaries from church, that I had seen just a short time before walked into the gas station- they were not breaking the Sabbath, they had stopped in to get directions to someone's house they were heading to. But I felt humiliated. I had been caught in my act of breaking the Sabbath. It was embarrassing and I will always remember it and the lesson I learned from it.

Norma did come to my rescue shortly afterward. I was able to get gas in my car and drive home, and the rest is history!

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Sober

21. The age when you can officially drink. Well, for my 21st birthday I drove down to San Diego to stay with my best friend Anna. I'm a good Mormon girl, and so I wasn't planning on drinking (and I didn't- I guess I should clarify before going further.) Well, I got there at night and we went to the grocery store- where we bought some Martinelli's. We returned to her house where she had some champagne glasses. We poured ourself glasses and at midnight we had a toast to me turning 21! Good times. Well, the story doesn't end here.

The next day- or I guess, same day, but after we had slept, we decided to further the celebration by going out to eat and then we were going to go clubbing- my very first time at an actual club. So she took me to a place downtown and we went in. It was kinda exciting. Now, I love hip hop music and I love dancing and so we both partied it up. But I do have a bubble- I'm not one to freak or anything like it. Guys can dance with me or near me... but, like I said, I do have a bubble. So this one guy in particular started dancing with me, and I didn't care. A few minutes later he comments (yelling slightly, so as to be heard over the music) "You look sober." I smiled and replied, "Thank you- I am." With that, he stayed for probably about 10-15 more seconds before leaving. It was then that I broke down laughing. I thought it was great- it was the highlight of my night! :) Needless to say, with Anna I always have a good time, but that was an excellent birthday- one I will always remember- so if she reads this- THANK YOU! Good times! :)

Eating out of the trash

Alright, so this one has a little side story. So at the beginning of this semester, my sister and I decided we wanted to have a game night on Sunday night. We planned it and set up fliers. Well, Sunday afternoon we were hanging out and some people were sleeping and then there was a knock on the door. So I went to go answer it. My friend Ashley (from California) and I were the only ones awake. Well, there were three guys standing outside. One of them asks if this is where game night is. I reply, saying yes but it's not until later that evening. Well, I let them in and we started talking. One of the guys got a little sidetracked and pulled out these truth or dare cards that I have. I think he laughed or something because I asked, "Are those good cards? I've never looked at them before." Which was true. Well, he responded yes and decided to give us a sample. He reads, "Have you ever eaten out of the trash before?" So I respond with a "Yes." Pause. "I bet that isn't the answer you wanted to hear first off... (I thought it was great because they were all starting to stare at me going, is this girl for real? We should take off running and warn everyone we meet about her...) But it's true, there's a story behind it- do you want to hear?" And of course they responded with a yes.

Well, it all started on my mission. My companion, Sister Robinson, and I liked to meet up with the elders on P-Day. This Monday was no different. We met at the church and Sister Robinson and I were writing letters. I believe that at this time they were trying to get us to join a game of basketball, and so they decided to throw a smartie at us which they had found on the floor. Without really thinking, I picked it up from where it had landed, inspected it for noticeable dirt and then, upon deciding it was clean enough, plopped it in my mouth and ate it. My companion was astonished- and the elders started laughing.

Well the following week I had gotten a box of cookies- my favorite at the time. They were Little Debbie's, the Christmas wreath ones (try them at least once, they're pretty good for store bought). Well, I was eating one in the morning while Sister Robinson was doing her studies. I stood up to go through the wrapper in the trash and part of the cookie fell in (on top of the wrapper) and instinctively, I reached in, grabbed the cookie and inserted it into my mouth. I swallowed and froze. My eyes popped out, my shoulders hunched forward and I looked like I was both disgusted and in shock. It was in such a mode that my companion noticed something odd and glanced up. Then she asked eloquently, "What?" I responded by saying, "I never knew how gross I was." And then I started laughing, and it was a few minutes before I was able to relate the story to her, instant replay included.

So, it was with that morning that we went to the church. Well, the elders still remembered throwing the smartie at me, and thought it was so funny. This time they happened to find a gummy frog lying on the church floor. They picked it up and threw it at me. Sister Robinson, my protector, and acting in my best interests, ran over and picked it up, scolding the elders, "Don't throw that at her! You know she'll just eat it!" (Truth be told, I really like smarties and the Christmas wreath cookies, but gummy frogs.. I probably would've left it on the floor.) But I started laughing anyways and as she ran towards the trash, I couldn't resist. I yelled after her, "Don't think that'll stop me!" She threw it away. Turned. And she started laughing. The elders had to wait before we were able to tell the story of that morning's adventure.

And so, yes it is true- I have eaten out of the trash. But hey, why not? Floor, trash... "God made dirt, so it won't hurt." Or at least that's what they taught us at Girls' Camp. (I wouldn't recommend it for all things. Even I consider it somewhat nasty- except in the aforementioned situations.) :)

Monday, October 6, 2008

Falling down stairs

Alright, so in choosing this blog topic I had some assistance from my lovely assistant, Carly. I asked her for a random topic which I would then write a story on. She mentioned falling down stairs and at the moment I can think of three separate occasions where I have had such a misfortune. They aren't all funny and knowing how much of a clutz I am, I'm surprised I don't remember more, maybe I will before I finish this post. :)
First story. My high school was laid out with 4 main buildings and then stairs going to the various levels in each building. Basically, there were lots of stairs, and I was always afraid of falling down them. Well, I was a "righteous" girl in high school and read my scriptures everyday (The Bible, the Book of Mormon or Doctrine and Covenants for those unfamiliar with the term scriptures). I always read them for at least 10 minutes before going to bed each night. There was only one night in high school that I missed. As fortune would have it- the next day was the ONLY day that I fell down the stairs at school.
Second story that I remember was in Mammoth- I don't remember all the details, but when my sister Katie was born I spent a lot of time with her. I took care of her a lot- much of that had to do with other circumstances that are part of a different story. But I was wearing socks and was carrying her. Well, I slipped going down the stairs and I was terrified that Katie might get hurt and so I tensed up and held onto her. She ended up crying, we think because it was a sudden drop and she could feel the tension in my arms, but she came out of it perfectly, whereas I bruised my tail bone and was not able to fully enjoy the rest of my summer. Going in the ocean with the motion of the waves REALLY hurt.
Third, (I remember another one) I remember when I was quite young being at a wedding reception or something like that. I think we were in Utah because there was a basement. Well I was having fun pushing this plastic shopping cart around, but I was too small to see beyond it and didn't see the stairs in front of me. I ended up tumbling down the stairs, over the shopping cart and then smashed down by it, the whole way down. Since I was quite young, I'm not sure if all the details are accurate, but this is how I remember it.
The last one I remember was actually at a Dodgers game. It was Mormon Night at Dodger Stadium. Hey! Imagine that! A Mormon night at Disneyland and now Dodgers games... Well, we were in the bleachers with everyone from the stake. I decided I was hungry and my dad gave us money and I was supposed to go with my brother. I was surrounded by people from my home ward on my right and people from the singles ward on my left. I don't know how exactly but somehow I slipped and ended up several stairs further down. If I must say, it was quite graceful- it looked like I had planned on sliding down because I popped back up as if it were my next step. The thing is, my brother hadn't seen a thing. I was almost disappointed that he wasn't going to have anything to make fun of me for that night. I asked around and it seemed like no one had seen it. It was devastating. Well, several months later I met this guy. I vaguely remember him sitting in the general area I had been sitting in that one night at Dodger Stadium. He, out of the blue said, "Hey, were you the one who slipped down the stairs at Dodger Stadium?" I was ecstatic! It's funny how someone seeing me fall made me so happy. One would have thought I'd want to go and hide, but sometimes I surprise myself.
I don't know if these stories are the greatest, but if you have a random topic and want to see if I can come up with a story about it, send me a message: singngcaligurl@gmail.com

BOMPs

Alright, so this will be more of a brief intro for more similar stories to follow. Living in Provo, Utah, is always fun. The people are good people who like to have fun and will even create new ways to have fun sometimes. One year while living in Old Mill we formed a club. We were called the BOMPs after hours of thought and hard work. It stands for, Bored Old Mill Peeps- aka the BOMPs. Yes I know, very tricky and very original. Well, if I must say so myself, we had a great ward and a great group of friends.
The first time we met was before we came up with our name. It was one Sunday evening. There was this one girl, let us call her Kali. Well, Kali wasn't in our ward, yet she just lived in the next building over. She was very nice and most of us were friends with her. She was not evil, but because she had an interesting past and we had wild imaginations she was (somewhat unfortunately) and easy culprit. This particular night I stopped by my friends' house. I had not, as of yet, met Kali, but everyone in this apartment was talking about her. She was a little boy crazy and the boys mentioned how she had hit on them, and so forth. And supposedly that first time she opened up to them about her past. And let's just say some people's pasts are not happy ones, and therefore you don't leave going, 'that was such a happy story'.
Well, it turned out that everyone had soon left and she had gone back to her own apartment and had convinced two girls to come along with her. One of them was my roommate- both were good friends. I jokingly remarked, "And you let her kidnap my roommate?" Everyone soon realized the danger my roommate was in. We decided we needed to plan a rescue mission.
Well, the way our buildings are set up, there are apartments set up around a courtyard. There are four entrances to the inner courtyard near each stairwell, but you have to live in that particular building to have a key to it. So we had to find a way to get in. We knew that they were in the living room, which faced inside towards the courtyard. So the plan was to create a diversion. We would have someone ding dong ditch the front door and when Kali went to go answer it we were supposed to rush toward the living room door and signal for the captives to escape.
So the flaw remained in getting into the inner courtyard. Luckily I had a cousin who lived on the first floor of that building, so we were able to get in through her house. We hid in the courtyard and there was this well structure close to her apt. I hid behind there with a few other people. Might I add- this was no small rescue mission. We were behind enemy lines and we needed a lot of support. It was very difficult to keep everything organized and planned and keep everyone quiet enough to allow for this stealth rescue mission. I'd probably say there were at least 20 people, but possibly more.
So, while waiting, there were several times when Kali came to the living room door and looked out. I don't think she ever saw any of us, but her intuition must have been intact because each time she looked out, she looked suspicious. Unfortunately we had someone at the door that led out to the stairwell that was supposed to tell us when the ding dong ditch happened and something went wrong. Chaos erupted. She never caught anyone- but we weren't able to get the attention of the girls inside because the timing had been messed up.
We had to go back to our headquarters and regroup. But shortly after we had gathered everyone again our friends escaped the dragon's lair without a scratch. We were all relieved and decided it was a job well done for the night.
This is not our only mission revolving around Kali, but it was our first, and it was the first time we came together as a group. Yes, it was at the cost of another, but if anyone feels like it was mean, you can feel free to make me the culprit of some story. You can ding dong ditch me or start a prank war as long as there is not destruction of property. Just beware if you start an actual prank war... I like to get even. Muah ha ha ha ha. :)

Light pole

This story is not my own, but it stars some close relatives of mine. I don't know how much they want to share, so their names will remain anonymous. :)
So once upon a time, a long time ago, there was a group of teens. These teens were pretty good kids- they were Mormons, and liked to have good clean fun. Well, one night they went to Mormon Night at Disneyland (because they used to have Mormon night at Disneyland). On their way back they started getting a little sleepy. Lo and behold, the driver, started to swerve and ended up running into a light pole. One with electrical lines on it. Well, they were close to home, and so they decided to walk the rest of the way home. Upon returning home they decided it was best to tell their parents. Everyone involved seemed to be alright- or at least they were all walking with no apparent huge injuries. Dad however decided to be sure and decided to pile them into his car to take them to the Emergency Room.
Upon reaching the Emergency Room they found the nurses and doctors and the surroundings to be in complete chaos. The lights were out and there seemed to be no apparent order. Dad decided to ask, "What's going on in here?" Someone in the dark responded, "Some idiot ran into a telephone pole and knocked all of the electricity off...." Well, these were the kids who were to blame, so what are you going to do now? The doctors surely aren't going to be nice and go, "Oh, you knocked the power out? Let me help you with that..." More like, let me help inflict some more injuries on you for the inconvenience here... So Dad wisely replied, "Oh, well these kids were having a sleepover and were wrestling and this one fell down the stairs. I think something happened to his knee...."